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carpenter bee parasites

i live in CT and ihave been seeing blackish flies with white spots on them.they come out of carpenter bee nests .

Bee flies or mason wasps.
Well, there is at least one large bee fly that is a parasite of Xylocopa carpenter bees. It has no common name, but the scientific name is Xenox tigrinus. Please see the guide pages. HOWEVER, I think you might be seeing large mason wasps, Monobia quadridens, emerging from ABANDONED carpenter bee nests, which they take over and stock with caterpillar provisions for their offspring. Several other wasps and bees also utilize abandoned carpenter bee tunnels.

 
Xenox tigrinus
I just watched a Xenox tigrinus emerge from a carpenter bee tunnel, followed by a carpenter bee, followed by another Xenox! So far, four Xenox have emerged from this tunnel, but I only saw one Xylocopa. I'll see if I can post a couple of pictures...

 
I have been watching Xenox fl
I have been watching Xenox flies go in and out of Xylocopa tunnels on my porch in Texas today.

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